Christmas Celebration #1

It was nice to get to celebrate with my parents and the Messengers.  The house was loud at times, but it was also full of laughter and conversation.  It was a special time to have everyone together this year.  This won't be the case down the road, so I appreciate it when it happens!

What I've been thinking a lot about during this Christmas season is gifts.  And maybe this is a big deal because I love the thoughtfulness that goes into gifts.  I love getting a gift, not because I made a list and got everything I wanted... but gifts make me feel special because the person actually thought about me when picking out the gift.  Have we lost the thoughtfulness behind a gift?  I notice it the most in my kids.  The thing that everyone does now is make lists.  And I can see how those can be somewhat useful to family members that aren't around to know what the kids are into these days.  I do feel that the lists should end as an adult.  If you are close enough to buy me a gift because you care about me, then you are close enough to know me.  Don't just buy me a gift because you feel like that is what you are supposed to do.  In that case, let's just keep our own money and call it a day.  I spoke to the kids about this recently.  I told them that I didn't want a list next year.  I should know them well enough to walk through a store on my own and know what they would love.  The lists they create takes away any thought that the other person has to put into the gift giving action.  Maybe it's easy for me to buy gifts for others because gifts are important to me.  I know how special they make me feel so of course I pay attention all year and really work hard on getting to know the person when buying their gifts.  I'm not the best gift giver.  I'm sure I might buy or make something that the person didn't necessarily love.  But they should feel the love I have for them when they receive my gift.  They should know, without a doubt, that I put time and thought into it.  In the end, I feel that Christmas lists are taking the thought out of the gifts.  And not only that, they become a list of expectations and disappointment for the kids that create them and don't get everything on it.

My Birthday Week...and Family Christmas

I love my birthday!  I love everything about celebrating it. I have never minded getting older.  It doesn't bug me at all.  I'm proud of the gray hair I have.  I love my birthday because I get to celebrate my life!  Yes, I love gifts.  That is totally a love language of mine.  But gifts to me present themselves in many ways!  It comes in the form of small handwritten notes, time spent with friends and conversation, small thoughtful gifts that I receive because people thought of me...  I don't need a lot of money spent on me.  I need time and I need thoughts.  Because of this, why does my birthday have to be limited to one day of the year?  I spend at least a week celebrating!  I also take a "me" day during this week to think about the year I just experienced and process the good things, the bad things, and all the memories I can remember.  This year my main thought process on "me" day was...are my actions meaningful to me and others?  I don't want to go through life just going through the motions.  Why do I do what I do?  Are the relationships I spend time on meaningful?  Do they bring value to my life and do I bring value to their lives?  Am I making the lives of those around me better in any way?  These aren't easy questions.  And the answers I've come up with for some of them aren't in the direction I would hope they would be.  This isn't a one day revelation.  This isn't like a New Year's Resolution, where I commit to it for a week and then go back to my usual ways.  This is a life long process of internal reflection and asking the hard questions.  And what's wrong with questions?  Do we not ask the questions because we are afraid of the answers?  Do we not ask the questions because it might mean change in some way?  I'm learning that I enjoy the questions.  I'm not afraid of them. They open my mind and lead to great conversations.  With that being said, "me" day was one of my favorite times.  I look forward to the next one!  Now, bring on the celebrations!!!

I started getting gifts and cards on Thursday and Friday from my close friends...
On Saturday, Jill and the kids made me a birthday cake and surprised me!  The rest of the day was "me" day.  I read my new book, drank coffee, and wrote thoughts down all at the Electric Brew!  I ended the day with dinner at the Brewery.

On Sunday, the kids and I took a trip to Chicago!  We went to a Christmas Market and then walked through the lights at Lincoln Park Zoo!  We had a great day together and got a little Christmas shopping done!

On Monday, I got a Christmas Cactus from my co-worker, and birthday cards from my kids!

Tuesday, I had a birthday lunch at work...
Wednesday, I had dinner out with Brandie and Nicole...
Thursday, I had lunch with Brandie and dinner out with Jessica and Alicia...
Friday through Sunday, I got to celebrate my birthday with my sis and celebrate Christmas with my family!
It was a big celebration this year and it is was all made possible because of the special people in my life!!!

My Thanksgiving...

Thanksgiving looked quite different this year.  It was different, but special at the same time.  Actually, this year, I was surrounded by more family than I ever had been.  This is a busy time of year, but what I love most about it is time with my family.  What I'm realizing is that family comes in different forms.  I'm thankful for the family I have...quirks and all!  But, I'm also thankful for the close friends in my life that I can really connect with...be authentic...be me.  They are also part of my family.

 On Thanksgiving day, my college sister invited me over to spend time with her extended family.  I had so much fun.  I connected with so many new people, I felt a part of something good.  We talked a lot, played games, ate a lot, and went on a walk to the covered bridge to skip rocks in the river.  It was so nice to be around this family and to feel and witness the love they have for each other.

Then we visited my family for the weekend.  Grace and Tyler got to meet their new niece, Lucia, for the first time.  But they had the most fun with Gabriel.  They played with him and they helped take care of him.  Mom and dad, Jared and Jenn, and I all had such a great time together.

 Jared and I had a great time reenacting Ghostbusters :)

Next stop...my birthday week!

It's not a new beginning...

My life is a lot different now.  It's not where I expected to be.  It's also not a new beginning.  My past is part of me.  My past shaped me.  I learn from it, I grow from it, and I own it.  This isn't a new beginning for me.  My life began years ago.  Just like everyone else, I've faced hard times and experienced good times.  Why would I want to erase all of it and start over?  That isn't who I am.  I am who I am today, because of my past.  I'm still on the journey of my life.  I will still have good days and bad days just like everyone else.  I'm not perfect, and that's okay.  I'm not trying to be perfect.  I'm just trying to make each day count, make each relationship count, and at the end of the day make sure those close to me know they are loved and valued and so special!  This blog is created to help capture my memories, thoughts, and of course keep my mom updated on what's going on in my life.  Love you mom :)

I absolutely love my kids!  Tyler is 8 and Grace is 10 and they are so fun to be around!  They are incredibly smart and loving!  The rule of taking pictures with them, is if they have to take a nice one, they have to take a "fun" one as well.  Most of the time, I'll post the nice pics, but this one was too much fun to pass up!

I am also a Notre Dame fan and doing my best to get my kids on board!  So of course, I signed them up for the Notre Dame kids club.  We went to our first event, women's basketball game, and we had a blast!